COME-ON AT THE BANANA STAND
When I was younger, I was lonely and wanted a relationship. There were times when I could not buy a relationship. (Actually I could, but I did not want to hang out in that part of town.)
Now I am older and not lonely. I enjoy the freedom of coming and going when I please. I cannot believe the number of opportunities for relationships that keep popping up.
Last night at a grocery store, I walked towards the banana stand. I saw a woman near the banana stand smiling at me. She was pretty, a little overweight and dressed in bright, bright colors. There would be no problem seeing things if the lights suddenly went out in the store.
At first I ignored her because my focus was on buying bananas, but she kept staring and smiling. I looked up, smiled, and then returned to focusing on which bananas to buy. (For those who don’t know me, I love bananas and needed to stock up because I was down to my last 147.)
She walked over to me and said, “Aren’t you going to wish me a happy birthday?”
Her question stunned me. It broke my banana concentration. The question suggested that I must know her. She did look like a woman I had not seen in over 12 years. Her birthday was July 25.
“Your birthday is July 25?”
“No it’s tomorrow, August 12.”
“Sorry, but your question suggested that I should know you, and you look like a woman I have not seen in a long time. Her birthday is July 25.”
“So, aren’t you going to wish me a happy birthday?”
“Happy Birthday for tomorrow.”
I returned to focusing on which bananas to buy. I thought she would walk away, but she didn’t.
“What sign are you?” she asked.
I wanted to answer, “I’m a virgin.” I thought my silly answer would lead to further conversation, which I did not want, so I answered correctly.
“I’m a Taurus.”
“Oh Taurus! I once had a boyfriend who was a Taurus. He had lots of women and cheated on me.”
I had managed to select some bananas and said, “That would not work for me. Women lose interest in me once they find out I have no money.”
I could hear her laughing out loud as I turned and walked away.